were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
He felt like a one man threesome
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
