he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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