i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
