I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
