Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
