dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Randomize
