I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize