reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize