So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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