that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
