I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
