don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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