Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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