me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
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