He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize