he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
