Betty ford says i'm here all night
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
