I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
