My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
