How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
