Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
