I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
