He is an equal opportunity slut.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize