i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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