How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
foreskin is a definite game changer
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
