i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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