if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
