sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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