your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Come share oat with me in your robe
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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