Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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