Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
