i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She announced her abortion via fbk
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
How's work?
Spinning.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
