CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
