Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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