DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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