I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
