After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
