The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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