so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize