thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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