ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
