Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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