Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
