i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My feet surprised me
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize