haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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