JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize