I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
