Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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