Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
