Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
