she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
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