Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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